Fuckin' cold down here. Stupid weeks has passed, ended up at the lunatic asylum, they let me out after 2 evil nights, now I have to go there 3 times a week to get pills that doesn't work, as it wasn't enough with the 3 weeks of surgery, then went out of pills and started eating other pills and drinking, not good at all, one night after a quarrel with Helena I ended up in the studio and stabbed myself with a knife in my right arm (just to wake up with another infection). Had enough wounds already, fuck! Lately been working on a video on the computer, fuckin' pathetic video it is, but so is my life. Strange dream, was in Italy and met Martha, don't know what it was about. Need more pills, a fucking lot of them. Fuckin' autumn...